Cinderella bleeds

She once had a life. She felt the glow. A beacon of hope it was. As the horizon appeared, blue became grey, yellow was not to be. Black became imminent. The beginning was fairytale. The middle was rockyroad. The end, a slow painful death of Cinderella. I read and wept.

As she read and re read, she felt sad and bitter. Mostly for the poignancy of everything

She has always been grateful and thankful. Never complaining. Always giving. As the chapter of life ends and book seemingly closes, I want a fairytale.

The politics of peace and religion

So much politicking going on around the globe. So much carnage and deaths and bombings and killings. It's draining to the brain. The eyes wants to see but most people don't even care! They try not to give a damn, but ultimately, everything hinges on us. How we are to them matters. The politicians, the military, the church. Religionism and lack of understanding about different ideologies and the lack of respect for each beliefs puts us all in dangerous situation. Troops deployed in war torn countries are suffering so much. Death and casualties of war ignites passion for call to peace. But how can we have peace when most (of us) doesn't really understand what is the root cause of all the hatred. For most Muslims, they think the west is an evil empire taking away the sanctity of their own faith. And for that, people suffer. Iraq and Afghanistan- these two nations can't seem to move on because of that very problem that exist. The hatred for the west. Extremist has planted in the minds of radicals, that to gain back their existence, the west must be wiped out. And they do these by bombings. They are stilled by hatred. To them, the west is the mighty God, dictating the future of everyone. To understand is to learn. Maybe through learning we'll gain peace. But peace is hard fought. People are out there forsaking their lives for us. Defending the very nature of bringing peace. The least we could do is to understand! We are shackled by our own religionism which prevents us from gaining that elusive peace. Holy ramadan month starting and bombings and killings doesn't solve anything. With many suicide bombing and terror and all that triggering battle, Muslims killing each other as result. Peace still nowhere in sight.

I know I didn't make any sense. I wanted to post about things inside my mind. Whatever really! It's raining now. I'll blog out. Maybe I'll delete this. Yes.

So who's brain is better, huh?

Reading now this article from WashPost. Got me laughing. I don't know. Good stuff there. Heck, female brains has" juice?!" Uh huh. "Males and females may perform similar calculations, but they use different "circuits." Woman is Mac. Man is PC. Blame the brain".

So, the Brain of the woman is well more equipt to handle everything, in softer kinder way, and men, they tend to shut the crap up. Well pardon, obviously I'm female and think some aspects of the men's brain is really much more better than women. They excel more (though now there are more bums than ever. Heh) and sure they "think about sex every 52 seconds, while a woman does only once a day, while a woman does only once a day." Baloney! There are a lot of nymphos out there who always think about (having) sex every 52 seconds! (oh not fricking me, I belong to nunnery once a day..or week perhaps..swear not lying, hehe). But I think this right here "a woman knows what people are feeling, while a man can't spot an emotion unless somebody cries or threatens bodily harm" is not really true, I mean, yes, it is right but not all right is true. There are men who are sensitive who can spot feelings. But maybe most of them are just defensive to readily admit that they do feel. Wimpy willow! Heh.

So the consensus: men are good, but women are better? Uhm, I don't how to use mac! Er, cos I don't have one!

Hounding barks, frightening dream

Damn it. I dozed off while laying down in bed and I dreamnt about a pouring rain, an unknown man, darkness and big dogs. The rain, the man,the dogs barking (advancing and sniffing) scared the mind. Vivid vision of the dogs with fangs got me the chills. The dream lasted five minutes. Creepy. I have dog phobia. Getting sleepy. I'm rambling babbling scary crap hence not making sense.

*edit.. Siesta time. Boredom blog. Bad me! I didn't go to the blah blah for some blah bah. I let it pass..yet again! Had a bit of white lie (we all make white lies from time to time!). I reason upset stomach. And earlier, I just didn't feel like it again.

Too fast too furious

Get well soon Richard Hammond! The 36-year-old was thought to be driving at about 300mph on an airfield near York when he crashed on Wednesday. Hammond was driving a jet-powered dragster similar to the Vampire - used by Colin Fallows to set the British land speed record. It is thought Hammond was attempting to break Fallows' record of 300.3mph (BBC)

If you don't know who he is, you don't obviously watch BBC's Top Gear motor show and you probably wouldn't give a shit. But I watch the show, the presenters are charming, plus cars are awesome! Richard is one of three presenters (along with Jeremy Clarkson and James May)

And this according to Clarkson "I would just like to say how heartened Richard will be when I tell him just how many motorists and truck drivers on my way here wound down their windows to say they were rooting for him."

Aww, sweet really. Hope the " Hammond " recovers and be back presenting.

New word to hate: "Repurposing"

That's according to Judy Muller. Link via Romenesko. Article here

Yeouch! Got me thinking now. Hmm, I wonder if I'm guilty of"repurposing?" Eh, I don't think I am so but anyhow, my blog is just amateur wannabe trying hard to be professional but failing by long long standards plus it's personal crap hardly newsies but when I blog a certain news item from other newsources- like many online news sites- (yahoo and others, I give credit and links). I don't post anything as my own 'cept my personal dramatics and nonsensical social commentary only I would bother to blog about.

And yes, plagiarism definitely sucks and is evil. Heck one blog entry I made was plagiarized before.

On a sunday morning, hunting high and low

I'm hungry. I remember breakfast before but not anymore. It leaves a bitter pill of thought inside and I want to rage but I'm devoid of anger. I know when to stop and look. But I still hunger.

So what's for breakfast right? My thoughts and they are good. Freeflowing with richnesss only I could I taste. I'll share it but, it's contagious. Either it'll bring one to madness or I get slammed but whichever, I'll still share...the hunger.

*edit. But I eat breakfast alone.

Late pm: I'm redundant. Thesame blog for now (minus breakfast whine).

Fuck. I'm grinning! Stoooooop it! to feel a feel is but wonderful, even as I'm the only one who feels. I don't care. It's stupid really(on my part) but as long as I feel, I'm fucking alive! And thelark still grins! changes mood. I feel solitary desolation. *sigh*

No need to apologize

This is what triggered the Muslims reaction of protest and violence:

Pope Benedict cited the words of a Byzantine emperor who characterized some of the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad as "evil and inhuman," particularly "his command to spread by the sword the faith."The pontiff did not endorse that description, but he did not question it, and his words set off a firestorm of protests across the Muslim world

The Pope said he regretted offending Muslims with the remarks he made, I don't think he needs to apologize!

I won't expound and give any long blog thoughts because it's about religionism and plus I don't really know the whole philosophy of being Muslim. But as a Catholic, I could say a lot about Catholicism and it's doctrines but I won't. I know nobody reads this crap but one might chanced upon this and I don't think I'd want to inflame anybody's beliefs and whatever the hell their religion might be.

Newslink via Yahoo/AP

US supreme court transcripts now free online

Bound by the revolution of the world wide web, oral arguments transcripts will be made public and easily accessible to everyone via their website http://www.supremecourtus.gov.

Coupled with another recent innovation, the identification in the transcripts of which justice is asking a particular question, the court's new policy "creates the potential for more intelligent speculation by more people than just those who were in the courtroom.(WashPost)

I don't think we'll see these mighty oldies in black robes pretty soon in our idiot box but at least trasncript are now free. If you're potential lawyer in the works, this is helpful.

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I'm sleepy. *yawns*. I feel like lazy tired kitten. Hungry as well. Damn. I'm always either sleepy, tired or hungry. I bore myself!

The big F

Tired and worn out at the end of the day. I went up the mountain, came down on hill! For the second time, I felt the stung of Failure lashed at me. I'm flailing at life. Downcast right now. Maybe third time will be lucky one. Haay, I dunno. The trip to heaven wound me up in hell.

I'm hungry and haven't eaten. It's hellish outside.

*edit... forgot to add. I'm giving myself a pat on the back. I did a random act of kindness earlier :) Not much really, but I bought me a large orange juice from Starbucks and after couple of sips, didn't feel like it anymore. I looked for some streetkids loitering but couldn't find any then I saw this young girl pushing a cart and sweeping the streets. Yep, you guessed it right... I gave my still full to the brim juice to her. Got rewarded with a smile and a thanks. I guess that made it up for feeling disconsolate (not really *sigh*). Oh well it was so freaking hot and she was cleaing the street so...

Shit. I a think I just didn't feel like carrying a large cup of juice! But nah.

The mind is fragile

I'm sleepy. I'm still tired one. Funny thing is, I don't do anything. Yet I'm tired. Tired of fucking empty space! Tired of nothing! Just feeling empty makes iteven more tedious. The fact that I'm still able to express hate probably means there is something more deep and intense longing. Bound by the pride of trying to prove once more. It drives me to the brink of insane delight. Fuck. Maybe I cherish my misery alone. Damn it! Plight of the pathetically apathetic! Heh. The future is blurred by visions of nothingness. Uncertainty leaves me wondering.

On the other hand I'm crushing and it gives me something to feel. I'm sleep bound for now. Maybe in a little while.

9/11 lest we forget..

This from NPR

9/11 (with Allen Ginsberg in mind)
by Andrei Codrescu

Listen to the poem read by the author.

9/11, I can barely remember you, they’ve buried you in so much hype!

9/11 I wept when you were first on television! I wept for New York, for the dead, for all of us, for myself, for the world!

9/11, I was sure that the world had changed forever because bad guys wanted America dead and hated us because we listen to rock 'n' roll and wear no miniskirts on our naked faces!

Click the links to read or listen to the whole poem. It's the reality of the sad tragedy.

Tired

Water was everywhere. It started to rain heavily and when heaven opens up, the house gets washed away..inside..literally. Knee dip in floodshit. The whole of the inside quickly turned into water park. Had to wait for the rain to subside before cleaning the ark. So for almost 5 hours been doing nothing except cleaning.

And now I'm tired. I don't think I''ll stay all the way till sunrise. Mmm, I wouldn't mind a back rub.

I'm hungry and sleepy. The knackered one off to la la land.

The madman and his cohorts

The 9/11 anniversary just two days away, Al- Quaeda shows a video of Bin Laden and other hijackers planning the seed of terror that would become 9/11.

Video footage in which Osama bin Laden is shown meeting some of the hijackers responsible for the 11 September attacks on New York and Washington was aired last night on al-Jazeera television. In the film Bin Laden is seen sitting with Mohammed Atef, a former lieutenant, and Ramzi Binalshibh, another suspected planner of the suicide hijackings. Bin Laden is also shown greeting several of what the tape said were the hijackers. The film, produced by As-Sahab, al-Qa'ida's media branch. (Belfast Telegraph)

All I can say is bless this world we live in. Get those terrorists!

The illusionist or delusionist

Arrrrgh. Whew. One of those early morning Fridays. Heh. I'm staring. As usual. Meandering of the mind plays. I'm full of thoughts about nothing and everything. Personal bleedings of the mind. Matters of importance to me. It's mostly the great expectations. Failed endeavors of fucked matters of the soul..which left me feeling a bit phobia..tic. Still trying to be optimistic. I will try once more but I don't expect much now. Dont wanna be crushed again and feel the need to drown once more in my own sorrow.

I should put this in the journal but don't feel like babbling crap there. the journal is full of heart and feelings and once I start I won't be able to stop and whine will turn sour and I need some cheese for that so.. here is where this accomodates a short personal social sentiment. I must be having delusional thoughts right now. Blah. I'm currently not reading the book on the left. Halfway through, I got bored. Must be me I guess... or the book sucks! I dunno. I'm pretty sure I'll delete this nonsense blog later for it doesn't really make sense. Just psycho babbling here.

Just a thought before I blagh out. For Catholics 08 Sept is Mama Mary's Day. So now you know.

Oh and uhm, by the way, maybe title fits British PM Blair! said to be resigning within a year. Perhaps a realist. Politics kills us all, if you noticed! Hah.

Psycho rambling goes on and I still bleed from the mind. Thinking. Oh well, there's always comfort.

Raging bull...

Read something from CW Nevius of SFChronicle

36-year-old assistant coach of a youth football team from San Joaquin County, watched a kid blindside his 13-year-old son at a game in Stockton. In response, Petero basically lost his mind. On the video, he can be seen sprinting onto the field. He tracks down the kid on the other team and rams him from behind, knocking him flat. The sight of Petero, a grown man, clobbering the kid is enough to make anyone wince.

What kind of man would do something like that? What kind of father would allow himself to lose control so completely? Can you imagine someone who would?

I can. Me.

The kid saw a chance to tee off on a smaller, unsuspecting kid, and he did it. Petero's blood must have boiled. Bet he wishes he'd managed to control his temper. Continue reading

Haaay, just blogging this. Life's a lesson.

Croc hunter, Dead!

Steve Irwin was killed by sting ray while making underwater film documentary.

The job killed him. If it wasn't the crocs, it was bound to be something of animal nature.. but a stingray? Now you know how dangerous those stingrays are.

Convert of terror?

There's an American in Al-Quaida. He wants you to convert! Scary!

Is it Christmas already?

Oh my dollars! whew! a $10,000 tip left to bartender and the tab was only for like $26. Lucky lady! Company declined to name the man who left that whopping tip. Must be santa clause!Hey, I am here.. alone and I've been good! *SIGH* oh well when you're lucky. Now I feel sad. *sigh*